The Impossible list

Dia tulis senarai ini semasa umurnya 16 tahun. Dia kata saya lah orang nya. Saya masih tak percaya sebab itu ia adalah the impossible list. I am not THAT perfect. Diambil terus dari email dia kepada saya dan diletakkan disini untuk tatapan diri sendiri. Thank you sayang.

1. smart and intelligent - we both know that you are, you come up with good arguments, you have shared with me so many things, giving me so much knowledge.

2. speaks fluent english - yes, you do speak good english, with an accent :)

3. a malay - we both can't deny this.

4. a lawyer / a doctor - and this one as well.

5.. articulate and fluent - whether in english or malay, you are able to convey the things that you want to say clearly. you are good in both languages and you express yourself well.

6. poetic - all those beautiful songs that you have written.

7. artistic - the wonderful music you have composed.

8. wears glasses - we both agree that this is the freakiest among all. i wanted someone who wears glasses, not because he has imperfect eyesight, but because he'd look intelligent with it. You wear glasses for that reason alone - to look intelligent. Aren't we a match made in heaven? :)

9. passionate in everything you do - i like the way you talk about music, you talk about your work, the way you are proud of the things you do, the passion that you have for them.

10. resourceful - you are. remember when i ask you some questions and you are not sure of the answers? you went out of the way to provide me with the answers i needed, and i really appreciate that.

11. with sense of humour - kobis, tomato, kacang panjang. you make me laugh all the time.

12. always in control - i always see you as someone who will always have control over things, i think it's the way you carry yourself - your confidence, charisma, you have that aura around you.

13. ambitious and determined - remember you told me about your spm exam? where no one expected you to get so many As, but you ended up with strings of As. Yeah, that shows determination, maybe you didn't realise it, but only determination can get you that far. And you are ambitious, if not, you won't be where you are today.
If you still remember, in our conversation this afternoon, you said you want to be an asset to your firm, that is being ambitious and determined and i am so proud of you.

14. intense and deep - intense and deep, two of the many reasons why i was attracted to you at first.

15. a thinker - you think about anything and everything, the reasons for them, the origins, the roots.

16. in touch with your feelings - all the time. and you never failed to amaze me when you can actually describe your feelings in detail. remember there's this one time when we argued, you said you wanted to love me, say loving words to me, but you can't because your ego was in the way, i was in awe! not everyone is aware of what they feel and could talk about their feelings in detail, let alone their ego. and you did. you stepped up above everyone else.

17. witty - cerdik, macam kancil :) you have the answers, the reasons, the excuses, for every single thing!

18. expressive - yeah, all those times when you were in the train, at the lrt station, kissing me, expressing love for me amidst those thousands of people! :p

19. compassionate - you always put yourself in my shoes, you understand me and where i come from.

20. not boring, always entertaining - how do you explain me keep on calling you all the time?

21. comforting - you are always my shoulder to cry on, when i need someone, you are always there for me, you always say the right things and whenever i'm down, you always manage to pull me up.

22. spiritual but not extreme - i like the fact that you are close to God, you pray five times a day, you have a special bond with Him, but you are not like those who sees people like me as pests, you guide me through Islam, and i am forever thankful for that.

23. romantic and not shy about it - you know, you are the only person that has ever continuously whispers all those loving words to my ears, those words that i only read in romantic novels, those sweet words that are only said in romantic movies. when i wrote this entry a long time ago, i imagined a person like you, who would tell me how much i mean to him, who would unceasingly tell me how much he loves me. and now i found you. i love you sayang.

24. an idealist - you are a lawyer so you are a person who cherishes and pursues high and noble principles, purposes and goals, that makes you an idealist.

25. intriguing - the first reason of why i was drawn to you the first time we met.

26. sensuous - your kisses, your touch, your fingers, your lips, your eyes - how do you explain me getting wet all the time?

27. very physical - i love it when you always want to hug me and kiss me and touch me :)

28. a listener - you never failed to listen and after talking to you, whatever it is that bothers me then, just vanished.

29. a giver - you give me us, you give me love, you share everything with me and i know, if you were emperor shah jahan, you would give me taj mahal.

30. loves me unconditionally - you said yes to this the other day. thank you sayang.

31. loves me for who i am - with all my flaws, my mistakes, my beliefs, you still love me.

32. a feeler - you say i love you all the time, you feel me, you feel us.

33. patient with me - you are always patient with me. always. i know i sometimes frustrates you and there were times when you needed to explain things to me over and over again, but you have never complained - thank you.

34. thinks outside the box - you are not the typical malay and you don't have that typical way of thinking.

35. understands how the world works - that's why you are a lawyer, you are in the system, you might have some reservations, but you still belief in the system.

36. makes me feel special - you make me feel special all the time sayang.

37.. loves our children, pamper them and discipline them at the same time - you gave me Nor Muhammad Mikhael and Nor Iman Ariana. You won't let me have my swimming pool because you fear for their safety. I know you are going to be a good father.

38. be the man of the house - you are a responsible man and i know you will be responsible for us, for your family.

39. in control of the family - well, you decided not to let me have the swimming pool :p

40. respects my wishes - even when you don't let me have the swimming pool, you would still let me have my way by saying okay to the jacuzzi :)

41. treats me as a person - yes, and not as an object. you listen to what i have to say and respect my views and opinions.

42. knowledgeable - i can always count on you on things that i don't know.

43. sensitive to my needs and wants - you care for me, you know how i feel without me having to spell things out for you. You are able to read my thoughts, you know me so well.

44. sensitive to my feelings - the one thing that i appreciate the most is you not being ashamed of apologising to me. i really admire that in you. and i thank you, for letting me share that other side of you.

45. good in bed - all the time! the effect you have on me is unbelievable.

46. imaginative - not even once that i am bored of you, even when it comes to us making love. you are imaginative, in so many ways.

47. provides stability - i know you will be able to provide stability for your family. you were responsible enough to save money for your car, and soon to buy a house, and if you have that responsibilities in you, there's no doubt you can provide that stability needed in a family.

48. generous - i know you are generous, you promised me a beemer :). abang tak pernah berkira dengan your family, you give money every month to your aunt, you bought sarah so many things, and remember when i asked you about beggars some time ago? you answer is enough to show me who you are.

49. shows appreciation for the things I do - even when i cook something yucky, i know you would still say it's nice :). and you always, without fail, say thank you everytime i call you, even when i said not to. i know you appreciate me. thank you sayang.

50. able to sustain love and excitement in the relationship - always! everyday i fall in love with you, over and over again. every single day is like that first day we met, and every night feels like the first night we were together.

51. able to make decisions - i always see you as a person who has a clear mind, who knows what he's doing. the things you did before this, choosing your career, saving money, buying a car, those are big decisions in life, and you've made them on your own, and i'm proud of you.

52. not fussy - i remember you said that you will eat anything that i cook as long as there's one dish that is fried and another one with gravy. you'll be happy staying home with me, just watching history channel or doing work together. i love that.

53. clean - i know you are clean - you wear white shirt to work everyday :)

54. see things through my eyes, understand my views - you always do. even when you don't at first, you would always try to see what i see in the end. and i really appreciate that.

55. gentle and tender - when we are together, i can feel your tenderness, the way you talk to me, care for me, express your love for me - gentle and tender.

56. understanding and sympathetic - my grandmother once said, i must find someone who will sympathise with me.. when you sympathise with me, you will definitely care for me. and i know you do because all this while, you care so much for me. you understand my feelings without me having to tell you what i feel.

57. believes in me - if you don't believe in me, you won't be supporting me, you won't be listening to what i have to say and you won't have faith in me. you understand me and you know the kind of person i am.

58. see me as your equal - you not only listen to what i have to say, but you seek my opinions, you want my views on things that concern you. what i have to say matters and that's how i know you see me as your equal. thank you sayang.

59. have faith in me - if you don't have faith in me, i think you would have stopped guiding me towards Islam. you know that i know nothing, almost zero, but you believe in me. you have faith that i will learn - and that has kept me going, knowing that you believe that i can do it.

60. will let me work - i know you'll let me work because i need to pay for the jacuzzi you bought me :)

61. will let me further my studies - you supported me in this from the beginning.

62. will support me in everything i do - i know you will. you are my biggest supporter.

63. will hug me to sleep every night - :)

64. will hold my hands till we grow old - even if you don't want to hold my hands, i will hold yours :) but you are expressive, i know you will hold my hands tight even when we are 63 yrs old.

65. must understand my love for my parents - i know you do.